sniff.

a woeful tale of a lost dream, or perhaps simply a long neglected one. audience/ reader stats from this blog; ha, oh that endless fall downwards towards zero.
it has been a strange day; I've started working at varsity, as research assistant (lackey) for a lecturer again, but at least this time, i have a little office, with functional computer and view of courtyard, thus allowing me some space (literal and otherwise) to work away, dream away and drinking endless coffee in. i covered more than expected today, which is helpful, and i think (at least i hope) that it will be very good for me in terms of getting cracking on the final home stretch of finishing this stupid seemingly endless thesis. at least it allows me space to work in, to differentiate home/work/play time better than i was doing (very badly especially with builders around doing renovations to the house making me run away and play out all the time; oh I'm good with excuses). its just strange being back on campus really; feels like i haven't really grown much since i first got there at 17, like I'm still that little person, not in a bad way, just it hasn't changed so doesn't really allow me to feel differently to it. despite all the years I've been part of it, i still don't feel i belong there; like someone is going to discover I'm an impostor and figure out i know nothing! amusing. least i have my little room to lock myself away in; its quite nice having a base again. so here's to productivity, work and gainful employment again. the only down side (or perhaps the one that will give me the kick in the arse i need) of working back in the department again is that I'm forced to see m supervisor every day, and he's already grilled me on why I'm dragging my heals with the work.. damn.